Every month, $27.00 is automatically removed from my bank account and given to a gym. I used to make great use of that expense. I fell in love with yoga and ellipticals and cardio-cinemas and exercising was something I looked forward to instead of dreading. And then they cancelled my yoga classes (forever... so rude) and ever since, that $27 withdrawal has been nothing more than a reminder of how out of shape I am getting.
As much as I hate to admit this, it's been over a month since I set foot in a gym. I tell myself that this isn't as bad as it seems because I've played basketball a couple of times, but regardless of any excuses, I know this laziness can't go on. So tonight when some guys in my ward asked if me and Keesh wanted to go running with them, I said yes.
We started our 3.2 mile run (I still can't believe I tried 3.2 miles on my first run in months) and of course, we were going uphill. After about 20 steps, I seriously started questioning this decision. But I was running with 5 other people and I would look like a huge pansy if I turned around before we even lost sight of our apartments. So I kept going.
Then about a half mile in, Keesha fell in a hole and twisted her ankle. While she was more embarrassed than hurt, she still decided to head back. And all I could think was that I really wish I would have been the one to fall in that hole. Not for any noble better-me-than-her reason. Pathetically, I just wanted an excuse to stop running. No such luck. Both my ankles held up (they couldn't make it through a state championship game, but put me on a run I don't want to be on and suddenly they are indestructible? Ridiculous.) So while one of our new friends took Keesha back home, I kept running.
And it didn't kill me. Eventually my lungs remembered how to breathe and my legs stopped angrily protesting (I know I will feel it tomorrow, but I'm trying not to think about that tonight) and I realized that I've really missed running. Especially at night. Paranoid as I am, I can't bring myself to venture out into the night by myself and since night time is the best time to run, I've really been missing out.
So even though I wanted to lay down and die at the end of the first mile, I have this to say.
Dear Running,
It's been too long.
I'll see you soon.
Love, Nikki
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